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Joke
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NEW 18.09.01 20:26
A man was dating 3 women at the same time, & he wanted to choose which
one to marry. He decided to test them. He gave each woman a
present of $1000 and watched to see what they did with the money.... The
first woman did a total makeover. She went to a fancy beauty
salon, got her hair done, new make-up, and bought several new outfits.
She told him, "I did this to be more attractive for you because I
love you so much!"... The man was impressed.... The second one went
shopping and bought him several gifts. She got him a new set of golf
clubs & some really nice clothes. As she gave
him the gifts, she said, "I spent all the money on you because I love
you so much!".... The man was very impressed.... The third woman
invested the money in the stock market. She earned back several times
the $1000, which she gave back to him. She reinvested the rest in a
joint account. She stated, "I wanted to save
for our future together because I love you so much."....The man was
extremely impressed. He thought for a long time about what each one had
done with the money, and how much each of them loved him. Needless to
say, it was the most difficult decision of his life. Finally after
several days of soul searching and sleepless nights, he made up his mind
and then married
the one with the biggest breasts.
one to marry. He decided to test them. He gave each woman a
present of $1000 and watched to see what they did with the money.... The
first woman did a total makeover. She went to a fancy beauty
salon, got her hair done, new make-up, and bought several new outfits.
She told him, "I did this to be more attractive for you because I
love you so much!"... The man was impressed.... The second one went
shopping and bought him several gifts. She got him a new set of golf
clubs & some really nice clothes. As she gave
him the gifts, she said, "I spent all the money on you because I love
you so much!".... The man was very impressed.... The third woman
invested the money in the stock market. She earned back several times
the $1000, which she gave back to him. She reinvested the rest in a
joint account. She stated, "I wanted to save
for our future together because I love you so much."....The man was
extremely impressed. He thought for a long time about what each one had
done with the money, and how much each of them loved him. Needless to
say, it was the most difficult decision of his life. Finally after
several days of soul searching and sleepless nights, he made up his mind
and then married
the one with the biggest breasts.
18.09.01 20:31
в ответ LU-KENGURU 18.09.01 20:26
Ey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got
headache, stomach ache, and my legs hurt, I not come
work." The boss says: "You know Carlos I really need
you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and
tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel better and
I can go to work. You
> should try that."
2 hours later Carlos calls: "Boss, I did what you said
and I feel great, I be at work soon. You got nice house."
headache, stomach ache, and my legs hurt, I not come
work." The boss says: "You know Carlos I really need
you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and
tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel better and
I can go to work. You
> should try that."
2 hours later Carlos calls: "Boss, I did what you said
and I feel great, I be at work soon. You got nice house."
NEW 18.09.01 20:53
в ответ LU-KENGURU 18.09.01 20:31
Если не проходит цензуру, то я сотру - <no problem>
In 1993, the American Government funded a study to see why the head of a
man's penis was larger than the shaft. After one year and $180,000.00, they
concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the
man more pleasure during sex.
After the US published the study, France decided to do their own study.
After $250,000.00, and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason
was to give the woman more pleasure during sex.
Poland, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study. After 2
weeks and a cost of around $75.46, they concluded that it was to keep a
man's hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead.
In 1993, the American Government funded a study to see why the head of a
man's penis was larger than the shaft. After one year and $180,000.00, they
concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the
man more pleasure during sex.
After the US published the study, France decided to do their own study.
After $250,000.00, and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason
was to give the woman more pleasure during sex.
Poland, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study. After 2
weeks and a cost of around $75.46, they concluded that it was to keep a
man's hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead.
...прям не знаю, под какой именно joke свои смайлики нарисовать ?? Ну считай, что под все !!
NEW 19.09.01 12:44
в ответ LU-KENGURU 18.09.01 20:53
A young man wished to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart's birthday and,
as they had not been dating very long, after careful consideration he
decided a pair of gloves would strike the right note - romantic, but not too
personal. Accompanied by his sweetheart's younger sister, he bought a pair
of white gloves; the younger sister bought a pair of panties for herself.
>During the wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items and the sister got the
gloves. Without checking the contents of his parcel first, he sealed the
package for his sweetheart and mailed it along with this note:
>
>"Darling,
> I chose these because I noticed you were not in the habit of wearing any
when we go out in the evening. If it had not been for your sister, I would
have chosen the long ones with buttons, but she wears the short ones that
are easy to remove.
>
> These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed the
pair she had been wearing for the last three weeks and they were hardly
soiled. I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart.
>
> I wish I were there to put them on you for the first time, as no doubt
other hands will come in contact with them before I have the chance to see
you again. When you take them off, remember to blow in them before putting
them away as they will naturally be a little damp from wearing.
>
> Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming year. I hope
you will wear them for me on Friday night.
>
> All my love,
> Hollingsworth.
>
>P.S: The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little for showing.
Не каждая серая масса имеет что-то общее с мозгом.
as they had not been dating very long, after careful consideration he
decided a pair of gloves would strike the right note - romantic, but not too
personal. Accompanied by his sweetheart's younger sister, he bought a pair
of white gloves; the younger sister bought a pair of panties for herself.
>During the wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items and the sister got the
gloves. Without checking the contents of his parcel first, he sealed the
package for his sweetheart and mailed it along with this note:
>
>"Darling,
> I chose these because I noticed you were not in the habit of wearing any
when we go out in the evening. If it had not been for your sister, I would
have chosen the long ones with buttons, but she wears the short ones that
are easy to remove.
>
> These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed the
pair she had been wearing for the last three weeks and they were hardly
soiled. I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart.
>
> I wish I were there to put them on you for the first time, as no doubt
other hands will come in contact with them before I have the chance to see
you again. When you take them off, remember to blow in them before putting
them away as they will naturally be a little damp from wearing.
>
> Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming year. I hope
you will wear them for me on Friday night.
>
> All my love,
> Hollingsworth.
>
>P.S: The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little for showing.
Не каждая серая масса имеет что-то общее с мозгом.
NEW 19.09.01 18:53
в ответ Irischa 18.09.01 20:35
Tochno! 
Muzskaja intuicija! 
A govoriat, tolko my, zenshchiny, intuicijej rokovodstvuemsia, o u nich (muzchin) jaboby vsegda logika na vyshine
...da oni chasto ne toj golovoj dumaet, okazyvaetsia!!! 
Interesno, kak by postupila zenshchina, esli jej nado bylo vybrat mezdu 3 bogatyriami?
Dela, pered uluchsheniem,imeet tendenciju uvelichivatsia ...
Muzskaja intuicija! A govoriat, tolko my, zenshchiny, intuicijej rokovodstvuemsia, o u nich (muzchin) jaboby vsegda logika na vyshine...da oni chasto ne toj golovoj dumaet, okazyvaetsia!!! Interesno, kak by postupila zenshchina, esli jej nado bylo vybrat mezdu 3 bogatyriami?
Dela, pered uluchsheniem,imeet tendenciju uvelichivatsia ...
